Ohmygod I introduced ny dad to Skyrim and literally told him “follow the arrow” (quest marker) while escaping from Helgen.
"OHMYGOD DAD FOLLOW THE ARROW"
“THE WHITE ONE ON TOP”
“there’s two different arrows, one on top and one on that guy”
“It’s that same one - JUST FOLLOW IT DO YOU WANT ALDUIN TO EAT YOU?”
And then I loaded up one of my saves and unleashed him in Whiterun, where - I swear to god - he accidentally unlocked Uthgerd the Unbroken’s house and stole all her silverware
I FUCKING HATE DWEMER RUINS
BECAUSE ROBOTS AND FALMER AND CHAURUS
So I found a Skyrim map online for a bunch of money
And decided that I wanted it but I’m poor
I made it
So I started up a new Skyrim save and uh
So I just installed 32 new mods
Here’s to hoping it won’t crash
I’m gonna be honest tho.
If you could marry dragons in Skyrim, I would marry Paarthurnax.
I’d wear an Amulet of Mara around him and nothing else.
That voice tho
I remembered why I love Serana
Me: how long were you jailed
Serana: i don’t know. Who’s high king?
Me: that’s actually a matter of debate
S: oh good, a war of succession. Who are the contenders?
Me: the empire supports elisif and the rebels Ulfric.
S: …what empire
Me: bitch you old
My dragonborn is Windhelm’s public enemy number one
She goes into the Palace of Kings, draws Ulfric out and shouts at him